Saturday, October 16, 2010

Chaos

I'm not sure really how to feel these days. What's there to feel? I'm empty and alone. I'm lost and unloved. I've been passed off and abandoned. No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to find any peace or happiness. No matter how many people I talk to, that will never change. I feel too far gone. I wish I had a reason to be happy. I just don't.

I'm not sure if it's good or bad that I have turned to writing as an outlet? Does it help? A little. But I have no one to talk to. No one is allowed to know about my life. But, thats what I don't get. What's there to hide? I haven't had sex is longer than I care to admit. I don't have a boyfriend... or any other half. It's just me really. I have friends and shit like that, but it's just not the same. Where the hell is my life going? I can't really seem to tell. It's all chaos.

1 comment:

  1. Outstanding blog. Check me out yourself. www.buffgrunt.com
    The poetry cafe section http://www.buffgrunt.com/ssi.html
    has many stories. The one called, " Where are the good guys" still kicks my ass. The point is, writing is a great way to control the emotions that come with combat. I have written some stories several times. I have had some published and then rewrote them the next day. This is all good for me and fuck the people who say I am obsessed. What do they know.

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